Monday, September 1, 2014

The Aliens are Coming

Boy sleepovers are much different than girl ones.

Case in point:

I was leaving the Arkansas Skatium (roller skating) Saturday night with a car full of nine year old boys.

"Do you see those lights in the sky?"

"Yes, I think they are spotlights. I saw them last night."

"Well I think they are aliens. You need to get us home right away."

"You are right, I'll step on it. I might look like Jack's mom but I'm really a warrior queen. I can get us home safely from the aliens."

"Are they really aliens?"

"No, we are having fun. They are just spotlights."

Much discussion ensued as I was driving down Chenal Parkway to the interstate.

"All the buildings have force fields around them, they are safe from the aliens. As soon as you get us home we will be ok. But you have to move quickly. Your name is Burn."

"I love it, yes I'm Burn. Burning up the road to get us home safe. You can trust me I'm moving as fast as I can."

"Burn baby burn."

Saturday, August 30, 2014

Friday Night Comic Relief

Oops. It's past midnight. Saturday morning comic relief.

Thursday, August 28, 2014

HIgh Plains Drifter

I've been listening to the Beastie Boys album Paul's Boutique for the last two days. It reminds me of my first two years of college - within a few weeks I moved out of the dorm into my boyfriend's rent house. His name was Paul but everyone called him Snake. I can't remember how many roommates he had - it seemed to change over the 48 months - but Baker (Colt 45), Boardman, and Collier were ever present. They were all addicted to the Oakland Raiders. Whatever happened to some of those guys I still wonder. I need to look them up on FB.

I stirred the conservative community at Hendrix College when I moved out of the dorms - it was a liberal arts college but we were also in the South. A couple of peers admonished me for my decision; including one that had more sexual partners in the first six months of college than anyone I knew, but was still putting up a moralistic facade. I think you are the one that needs to slow down and think about what you want in life, I wanted to tell that person, but I held my tongue and assured them that my situation was fine. I'm no judge. We all have to figure out our path in life somehow or another - rampant promiscuity was never on my agenda but to each his or her own. I won't judge you - just don't pull that church business on me when you can't look at yourself objectively.

My roommates worshipped the Beastie Boys - the albums were on repeat on the large floor to ceiling stereo system. It liked it much better than their Metallica. I shared my tastes - Poi Dog Pondering to James to Alice In Chains to Camper Van Beethoven oh I could go on and on. For a while there was a pet tarantula, I forgot its name but I remember letting it walk on my arm once; it felt like Q-tips had come to life and were inching across the surface of my skin. I remember a lot of Twin Peaks parties, and Northern Exposure. David Lynch movies. Falling asleep on the couch and waking to groups of barely grown men lighting farts (I pretended I was still asleep). I had a girl friend or two during this time period, but mostly it was this tight knit group of guys who somehow magically accepted me as one of their own and they were funny as hell.

Then when Snake and I broke up I had to re-group and find a new network. I maintained a loose friendship with a couple of them the last two years of college - concerts, catching up at parties, but the magic was gone. And I learned that overall, loyalties went to my ex - it was kind of shocking and heartbreaking and lonely for a while but natural in retrospect. We were just kids. They had formed friendships in high school; I was just a fleeting member of their flock. But it was a privilege to be there for that short period of time.

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

A Poodle

Sometimes active colitis looks like:

Caption: Pic I saw last week on the wall at my training institution that I think I remember taking (it was my job, always, media girl) when I was a resident.

Architectural distortion and crypt abscesses.

Tuesday, August 26, 2014


I was visiting with my esteemed colleagues at the University last week. Dr. Quick (he was behind me in residency. And now he is an attending. Ugh I'm old) was showing me a cool gyn case when I noticed this on his door.

Caption: Clinical History: Biopsy Proven Pathilloma

I laughed and asked him where that came from. "One of my colleagues at Brigham where I did fellowship. That was really written on the clinical history, can you believe it?"

I think that next time I am not sure of an answer in the radiology suite on smear I might say, instead of 'Atypical' which draws much ire, "I think it's a pathilloma!"

Monday, August 25, 2014

Sunday, August 24, 2014

Suicide Med

I've bought it, but haven't read it yet. I'll write a book review when I get to it. Fizzy's new book! Getting fantastic reviews! Get your copy on (cough I know there's been a lot of controversy there I read it in the news but oh well) amazon.

Caption: Suicide Med book - my copy. Currently using as bicep builder. Will graduate to reading soon.

Had a fabulous bday weekend at Stoneflower (thanks S). 

Caption: main floor of Stoneflower

What I wouldn't give to be back there lounging on those couches sipping wine and watching movies. Faye Jones is a genius with good timing. The kids loved visiting from dad and stepmom's lake house and checking out the ground floor stone grotto that made us feel like we were in an Austin Powers movie and needed to be wearing bell bottoms. If it wasn't 100 degrees outside and the wall air units weren't desperately trying to keep up despite the heat. We adjusted. It was perfect.

Caption: Ground floor of the three story Faye Jones house exactly one half the size of Thorncrown Chapel up in Eureka Springs. Supposedly this was his inspiration for the famous Chapel. It's delightfully creepy at night.